Created2 Love or What is Love?

What is it about love that causes us to go to great risks? And How do we really know what love is anyway? We throw this word “love” around like its candy at a parade. Which makes me wonder if we really understand it at all. We love pizza or chocolate or we love football. Go Dolphins! The other day we were talking about, the Office & someone said, “I love that show.” What? You love a TV show. But we also love our children, boyfriend or girlfriend, our spouse and God. It’s no wonder we’re confused.

Still everything we do revolves around love. “The world moves for love, it kneels before it in awe.” – William Walker, The Village. People spend their whole lives searching for love. We write songs about it. We write books about it. My brother just published a book of poetry motivated by love. We talk about it all the time. We even define our church by it – our mission and our very existence as a church is about starting a transformation of faith, hope and LOVE.

Yet with all this focus and attention on love it’s still really hard to find. So, what is love and where do we go to find it?

1 John 4:7 says, Dear friends, let us love one another. John is going to use this phrase 3 times in the next 5 verses – so it must be important. And the first thing we can do is rule out the misconception that love is a feeling. Yeah, it feels good and we love it (pardon the pun) but this is an imperative. Therefore, it can’t be a feeling because you can’t command someone to feel something that they don’t feel. Well, you can try but that doesn’t mean they are going to feel it.

So, that leaves us with only one other possibility – love is a choice. It’s an act of the will. Can love grow in us and can we feel it with every fiber of our being? Yes. But we either love or we don’t. It’s a decision we make.

It’s a risk we take but it’s a risk worth taking otherwise we face a life of solitude and loneliness. See, I don’t think the opposite of love is hate. I think its isolation. Hatred is certainly antithetical toward love but it’s not the end result, it’s only what leads us to isolation and loneliness and that’s the worst thing a human being can experience because we were created2 be known by love.

When we risk loving someone one else we’re putting our heart on the line, no matter who they are – whether they’re our parents, friends, or siblings. There is no guarantee that they’re going to love us back. But we love because the reward is worth the risk. There is no greater experience than knowing you are loved and finding yourself in communion with others.

This is the risk God took when He created us in his image and likeness. He gave us a free will to choose to love him or not. He said, “You can eat from that tree but I wish you wouldn’t because I love you and I want what’s best for you.” And even though we reject Him, he chooses to love us, no matter what.

Back to 1 John 4:7 Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Now we know where love comes from and where to find it. It comes from God. We’re always looking for it in other people or in things (money, fame, power) but if we want to find love we have to go to the source. We have to start with God.

We’re only capable of loving one another because love originates in God. We couldn’t love if it didn’t first come from somewhere outside of ourselves. None of us would take that risk. No one would allow themselves to be that vulnerable.If you’ve ever experienced rejection you know what I’m talking about and you know that it hurts. The capacity to love comes from God not from us. Since, love comes from God, all acts of true love are reflections of God’s nature. This means that whenever anyone does something out of love God is known even if that person doesn’t claim to follow God because God is known by love.

To be continued…

Note to Self

Yesterday, November 21, will be a marker. There is one hope and His name is Jesus.

I'm Going to Start Writing My Book

I've had this on my mind for quite some time, years in fact. I am not sure if it will be good but we will see. The title is going to be: The Seven Deadly Pastors. I'm sure there will be a subtitle but I haven't decided on that yet. Anyway, over the years of working in the church I have worked for 6 different pastors. This was over a 15 year span. As you can imagine, I have seen a lot of good things and a lot of really really bad things as a result of my tenure in the church.

I know what you're thinking, "I thought the title was 7 Deadly Pastors and you said you worked for 6 pastors. Yada Yada Yada" Well, the 7th will be the surprise at the end.

What do I hope to accomplish? I want to look at the role of pastors in the community of Christ. I want to look at the systems that we've created that have done a disservice to pastors and congregants. I don't want to hurt anyone at all but I hope to be honest about the humanity, loss, pain, joy and hope for the church. It's getting run through the ringer and a lot of that is it's own fault. But I think there is hope and even as I wrestle with what all this means I hope that on the other side we can become what God wants us to be for the world.

Well, there you have it. Wish me luck. I just need Barna to endorse my book like he endorsed Pagan Christianity guru Frank Viola. I'll even put him down as a co-author. He doesn't even have to write anything for mine either.

Let's see. Maybe if I start smoking a pipe it will help me get started.

Revisionist History - Start 'em Young

My son had to do a book report on one of our presidents. All the kids literally drew a name from a hat in the front of the class. My son drew, completely by chance, the 40th President, Ronald Reagan. My wife took my son to the local library to pick out 2 sources needed for the report. Mind you, this is 3rd grade. They picked 2 big picture type books with 2 page summaries of every President. If you have kids, you know the type of books I'm talking about.

Now, if I were to ask you to summarize the greatest achievement of each President and we got to Ronald Reagan what might you say? First thing that pops in your mind if you're honest? That's right - the Cold War. Maybe, the famouse speech in Berlin, "Mr. Gorbachev, tear down that wall!" The collapse of communism in the face of a strong U.S. foreign policy and new found freedom and human rights for millions of people. I posted this picture lest you forget.

Each book hinted in one small paragraph that Reagan worked with Gorbachev to reduce nuclear weapons. Neither book had the words "Cold War." Hmmm?

However, each book spent 3 to 5 paragraphs bashing "trickle down economics" (tax breaks for the rich and the cutting of welfare programs) and the Iran Contra Affair. One even had a big old picture of Ollie North testifying in front of Congress (one of my favorite surf spots is named after Ollie). Each book only had 10 paragraphs. Now, I admit that Iran-Contra was scandelous but that this dominates the discussion on Reagan in these books is scary.

Oh yeah, it also mentioned that he was the first President to be divorced and remarried.

Thankfully, my son was most excited about the fact that Reagan starred in "Bedtime for Bonzo" and that the co-star in the movie was a chimpanzee.

P.S. By contrast, there is one paragraph in one book and a sentance or two in the other about Clinton having sex with Monica Lewinsky in the White House. "But the "Comeback Kid" survived even that ordeal." and "...but even this (Lewinsky sex scandal) failed to diminish Clinton's favorable job-perfomrance ratings in opinion polls."

Hmm? I wonder who's writing these texts? I wonder?

A Win for Women

I still have no idea how my mom did it - raising two little rambunctious boys on a receptionists salary. She made our lunches, got us on the bus, worked all day, came home, cooked us dinner, helped us with homework, put us to bed and cried herself to sleep. The victim of an unfaithful and abusive husband, my mom did it all. She taught us about unconditional love and prayed for us every day. In the end, I think we turned out alright.

You know, it's been hard to find men who would step up and mentor me in my life. Most of the men who had the opportunity to mentor me have failed miserably - from my father to the pastor's for whom I've worked. In fact, two of my greatest mentors were women. Both Wanda and Rachel believed in me and took an interest in my life, family and career. They encouraged my abilities and openly routed for my success. On top of that, I'm married to the greatest woman I know.

I'm a fan of women in leadership.

Last night was a win for women everywhere. Yes, I'm talking about Sarah Palin. She was brave, articulate, witty and honest. This is really an historic moment in this country. Congratulations to all women, it looks like you have a champion. Now the choice is up to you.

P.S. If Barack Hussien Obama becomes president, how will he have time to be a good father and husband to his small children and wife?

Please Don't Take Offense

After a long weekend, my wife and I put the kids to bed on Sunday night, plugged in a DVD, and plopped onto the couch. I'm not too ashamed to say that we like to watch romantic comedies once in a while. Last night, we watched Definitely, Maybe. Plot: the parents are getting divorced and the father is telling his 9 or 10 year old daughter about his love life including all the sordid details.

Anyway, I got to thinking that I can't remember a recent movie (romantic or not) about a family that actually stays together. We watched the Spiderwick Chronicles the other day and that involves a family that moves to a spooky house because the mom and dad are getting separated.

I know that Hollywood has been trying to normalize divorce for a long time but haven't we gotten the message already? We understand: People get divorced and let's not make the kids feel any worse than they already do. But why do we normalize bad behavior.

At what point, in our culture, will we ever celebrate people who keep their commitments?

Where's My Apology?

Do you ever find yourself apologizing for things you didn't do or when it isn't necessary? What is that? This happened to me twice this week. I had two people rip into me and I end up apologizing to them. I'm not sure what was going on for them that day. Maybe, they were having a bad day or p.m.s.ing or work was stressful and they chose to take it out on me.

I like to keep the peace and I confront (I don't like confrontation) if I have to but why do I say I'm sorry when I don't need to? Is this a sign of weakness? A character flaw?

I'll tell you what isn't a character flaw - admitting when you are wrong and seeking forgiveness. I'll always try to do that.

Come to think of it, neither of the people apologized to me. What is valued when we fail to seek forgiveness? Pride? Arrogance? A product of bad parenting? A product of a society that doesn't take responsibility for its actions and that always thinks it's somebody else's fault? How did we get this way?

Well, I won't hold my breath, I will not lose sleep over this and I will stop whining but I will try to save my apologizing for when it is warranted. I think it will be more meaningful and I also think that it won't feed the pride of those who refuse to apologize when they need to do so. I'm not trying to be mean, I am just trying to be prudent.

One think I will not apologize for is living, working, having strong convictions and passions, being a person seeking integrity, staying optimistic and positive and functioning at an optimal level. That would be a slap in the face of the One who made me.

You are encouraged to join the movement to admit when you are wrong, seek forgiveness, give forgiveness and not to feed the pride of those who won't.

Stay strong and courageous. Peace.

The Things I Say

One of the hardest things in the world is controlling what I say. I grew up with one of the most critical and judgmental fathers in the world. At least, I think he would be in the top 10. He would at least place and maybe even get a bronze. Anyway, after a while it gets ingrained in your brain to always look for faults in other people. I guess it's a result of not thinking much about yourself and trying to elevate by denigrating others.

Well, I don't like it and never have. But still the battle to control the tongue rages on.

Yesterday, I saw that people were protesting the yet to be released movie Tropic Thunder because it used, what they referred to, as the "r" word too much. By the "r" word they meant retarded. The protesters felt that it was offensive to people who are mentally handicapped. Their protest phrase is, "Words Matters" or something close to that.

Now, your first reaction might be to say that people need to lighten up - it's just a movie. Maybe we do need to lighten up a bit but perhaps the protestors have a point - words do matter.

Yesterday, I was also joking with a friend and in the meantime really hurt this persons feelings. I would never want to intentionally hurt my friend's feelings but I did. In fact, I'd prefer to cheer people on. I think it makes for a nicer planet.

Still trying to watch the things I say.

The Stress is Rising

Well, I haven't blogged in almost a month. I have been in Costa Rica working out our mission for the month and today I am heading home with my family to the U.S. The work here has been challenging, tiring, hard, and rewarding. I have had the opportunity of knowing that dozens of people have become Christians, including people from the U.S. teams who came to serve.

Many people have seen true love, the love of Christ, on this journey. I have met new friends and have improved relationships with old. There have been reconciliations, laughter and even tears but mostly tears of joy.

But not once have I felt the chest tightening stress that I often feel in the U.S. I am not sure why but today I feel it for the first time in over a month. There is something about the way we live at home that causes great stress.

For the first time in almost a month I have thought of the most horrendous presidential race in recent times. Having little contact with home and very little internet access I have no idea what is going on.

I'm frightened for our countries future as we get ready to elect the most liberal president in U.S. history. We are not sure if he is a Muslim or a Christian. We have no idea what he really stands for except that he is for partial birth abortion, befriends terrorists, wants a $1.3 trillion dollar tax increase that will cripple our economy, proposes double tax on capital gains, has a wife who hates her country, he sat in a US hating church for 20 years, he is for appeasement of brutal dictators around the world and God only knows what other evil lurks in his mind.

I am frightened for the future of my children and all children in the US.

Fundraiser

So, I go into the Chic-fil-a today and I see a flyer for a fundraiser for a mega church in our town. No reason. Just a fundraiser. 10% of the proceeds for a few hours coming up on a convenient night.

Interesting. This place boasts 15k in attendance. Are they really hurting for money? Come on.

2 Words This Morning

Hulk Smash!

My Dad is a Jerk, a Loser, etc.

It's been two days since Father's Day (it's also the first day of legalized gay marriage in California) and this post is for anyone who identifies with the title of this post. This post is for all those growing up in a fatherless culture. This post is for all those who are living broken lives because their father dropped the ball.

What is a Father anyway? If I had to write a definition for father from my own personal experience it would go something like this: Father n. - a person who lies, cheats, steals, mocks, extorts, hits, yells, abuses his wife (and his second wife and his third wife) and children physically, verbally and emotionally; a person who leaves his seed and abandons all responsibilities and duties for personal gain and desire; a person who fails to teach; a person who only cares about himself; a person who has no idea how to manage his household for the betterment of his family and community; a person who fails to protect and who leaves the faith and life of his children and wife in the hands of the devil; a coward; less than a man.

Sorry, but sometimes the truth hurts because it's the truth.

I believe that sin and evil are passed down from generation to generation (it's Biblical and it's our common experience). I also believe that this vicious cycle can be stopped. We can make a choice as men (some aspiring to be so). We don't have to be like our earthly fathers.

I am not sure how old I was but it was somewhere between 7 and 12 years old when I discovered a different Father. I learned that God is ultimately my Father and that he is a good Father and that He loved me infinitely and without condition (please read Matthew 6). I didn't have to throw the ball perfect or sit perfectly at the table all the time or be mistake free. It was in that moment that I decided that I would fight with everything in me to never be like my biological father. It was a big vow for a frightened little boy. But somehow I knew that if there was a Father who was perfect and just and kind and who loved me enough to sacrifice his own son for me then I could be different.

I could actually love my wife and be faithful to her. I could actually love and teach my children all I know and that includes my faith. There will be nothing left up to chance in my household. I will love my wife and my children with the reckless abandon that my Heavenly Father loves me with and my kids won't have to guess at what God is like and what a healthy marriage is and what it means to be a man or a woman or how to be treated and to treat others. They will learn it because they will experience it. And then, one day, they will make up their mind whom they will serve.

But as for me, and my household we will serve the Lord.

You too have that choice. There is a Heavenly Father who loves you regardless of what your earthly father has done. He is a good Father. He gives good gifts. He is a Father to fatherless.

Dear Steven (Spielberg) & George (Lucas),

Please, please, please don't make any more movies. I went to see Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull and it was one of the worst movies I have ever seen in my life. The special effects weren't even good. I am begging you guys. When is the last time you made a good movie, with a decent plot that had just a little bit of realistic action. Let's face it, it took Lucas 3 tries in the new Star Wars Trilogy to make one good one.

Come on, a lead refrigerator in a nuclear blast and aliens taught the Mayans how to build a civilization. You have insulted the public for too long with your nonsensical movies. You guys are too old and too rich and have lost touch with the general population.

I used to be a fan but I am starting a boycott on any new stuff from you cats.

Here's some advice - give your money away to young, inspired and gifted film makers and spare us from your patronizing attempts to line your pockets even more.

I would ask for my $10 back but it is my fault for hoping that you could actually still make good movies. Please, please, please don't make anymore movies.

Sincerely,

Albert

I'm Not Sure What to Think About this Blog

I know a lot of people have blogs (a lot don't - the smart people) but have you ever gone back and read your posts? I actually did that one day and I couldn't believe some of the stuff I wrote. I mean, come on. What is up with this stuff? - a guy with b.o. at the gym, dog doo in my neighborhood, a picture of Obama frolicking with his shirt off, a poisoned dog (the name sake of this blog). How dumb is that?

No wonder only 2 people (me and the evolution guy) read this blog.

Don't ask me why I posted a picture of a scary cat. I guess it fits right in with this blog.

Some Rules are Bad Rules

My son and I were going to the movies on Sunday afternoon to see Prince Caspian (amazing by the way). I said, "Let's pop some popcorn (since they charge an arm and a leg and require you to mortgage your house, car and give up your first born for a popcorn and soda) and grab a couple bottles of water and put them in your backpack with your sweatshirt." My son (8) asked, "Dad, isn't that against the rules?" My wife quickly exited the room and left me hanging.

Then it slipped out, "Some rules are bad rules." This started a whole conversation, of course, about obeying the rules. I guess the safe thing to do would have been to admit that my son was right and to stay in the black and white. But life is gray sometimes and I know popcorn isn't that important but the conversation was bound to happen at some point, especially since I can be a bit rebellious.

But, isn't it true? Aren't some rules bad rules?

What if everyone in Germany would have followed all the rules in the 1940's? What if they would have had high tea instead of a big "party" in Boston on December 16, 1773? What if everyone would have followed all the rules in the 1860's and the 1960's? What if the first disciples would have followed the rules? What if Jesus would have followed the rules?

Blogging Boredom

Oh, the silence. Blogging has bored me to tears lately. Well, honestly I haven't cried about blogging lately or ever. See you someday.

An Apology to the Neighborhood

I want to publicly apologize to my neighborhood but I just can't bring myself to pick up dog poo. I am coming out of the closet. One day I even faked bending over to pick it up when a car was driving by. I just can't take it anymore. I have to come clean. Am I going to get a fine for this? If so I am calling the ACLU.

Who came up with this idea anyway? I mean, come on - walking around with a bag of poo. And then there is that humiliating feeling of stooping over to grab it with the plastic bag. Icky. It was probably some crazy environmentalist who has it all backwards.

Think about it. We are only adding to the landfill with millions of plastic bags filled with dog poo. Where's the outrage? Where's Obama? Seriously, I never see anyone using a paper bag (now there's a million dollar idea). It's always a plastic one. Wouldn't it be more natural to let it lie there and fertilize? I am no biologist but I think, "Yes, YES!". That makes more sense.

That does it. I am going green. I herby declare that you will not see me around the neighborhood with a sack of doo. Go green & let it lie. This is the new slogan of the Mission Dog Blog.

Sorry neighbors but I am going do my part to save the planet. Luckily for you my dog only weighs 10 pounds. If you have a Great Dane good luck applying for this program.

Simply "Naive" Questions About Evolution and My Shoulder

1) How can something as complex as the human shoulder evolve over an enormous expanse of time and allow survival of a species whose survival is predicated upon the use of a fully functioning shoulder? i.e. How does a species that needs a functioning shoulder in order to use arms and hands (taking out of the equation the necessarily chance evolution of arms, hands, fingers, blood, vessels to transport blood, heart, organs, cartilage, bone, marrow, muscles, joints, cells, and all the things that make up the human body that I have no knowledge of) to build, plow, plant, gather, hunt, hold, nurture, mold, shape, feed and eat survive?

2) Where are the intermediary forms (missing links) in the fossil record? Doesn't it stand to reason that evolving biological life on this planet would leave at least one proven fossil example of partially evolved creatures?

3) Can anyone explain the mind boggling complexity of a single cell and where that cell came from?

These are only a few of my "naive" questions.

"You're Naive"

So, Michael thinks I'm naive (see comment on Don't Play Sports & I Just Can't Make the Evolutionary Leap). I love it! Well everyone (all 2 people who read this blog), welcome to middle school. This is precisely what happens when people are unwilling to engage in an educated dialogue. This is precisely what happens when people adhere strictly to their doctrines without question. Let's be fair. This happens on both sides of the spectrum: from those who cling to the doctrine of Darwinism just because they don't believe in God - to those who believe in God just because "the Bible tells me so."

I would prefer it if Mike told me why he thought I was missing the mark rather than dismissing me as naive. But the issue Michael seems to be dealing with here is that he has no idea how something as complex as the human body could possibly evolve and survive while it was evolving. So, he resorts to name calling or dismissing the questions and the person in favor of his doctrine. He simply can't deal with the gaping holes in Darwinism and the thousands of unanswered questions about evolution. He is not willing to dialogue. So, what does he do? He chooses to silence or ridicule those with whom he disagrees. Most of the time this is done out of fear of what might actually be discovered.

But what is truly sad is that we can't have a dialogue that might be productive. We aren't aloud to ask questions without being vilified and the old adage that "no question is a dumb question" isn't true. And if this isn't true it means that all learning and discovery must stop.

What's interesting is that at this very moment a major documentary called "Expelled" is hitting the big screen and it discusses the very issue Michael has unwittingly raised by his comment. The issue is that Darwinists are unwilling to dialogue about the problems with their religion and theories and because they are unwilling to dialogue they are doing everything in their power to silence the dialogue, the questions and especially the people who ask the questions. The tactics are the same and they are scary.

What are people afraid of? Are we so afraid of finding the truth that we have devolved (thanks Devo-an 80's rock band for those who don't know) to middle schoolish name calling? Sad.

Of course, I could have completely misread the comment and Michael might have really been talking about my naivety concerning women and sports (which was all tongue and cheek). And if that is the case I agree with him. I admit it. When it comes to women, I am a bit naive. Peace.

Explore the Expelled Movie here. And please remember that the movie is about the issue of silencing free speech and those we don't agree with.

Don't Play Sports & I Just Can't Make the Evolutionary Leap

Okay. Here is my advice for all the machismo people out there - don't play sports. Take up reading or playing music or drawing or gardening or investing. Yes - all the things that I (you think now) thought were too sissy when I was younger. Besides, girls dig all this stuff anyway. They could care less if you are a sweaty beast who can hit a little round thing or tackle another guy like you're tackling some animal to catch your supper. I have come to realize this doesn't impress them one bit. But it took my 41 years, a bad knee and 2 bad shoulders to realize it.

I just finished having an MRI on both my shoulders the other day. You know this really big machine that resembles a white coffin, invokes claustrophobia and tortures you with deafening noises you never heard before for 2 hours. So, now I'm doing a little rehab for some partial tears in my shoulderous musculous joint of the deltoidious facitous thing (I think that's what the Doc called it) to avoid surgery.

Then I ask him about my knee and he says, after looking at the x-ray, "Well, you're looking at total joint replacement in about 15 years. But don't worry, I predict that they will be able to grow back cartilage by that time due to stem cell research. So, stop running on the tread mill." I say, "Thanks Doc, I'll just have a bad knee and I'll get fat. That will help."

So, were all the macho years of baseball, soccer, football, lifting worth it? Since it hurts so much today, I think you know the answer.

Back to the MRI. First of all, I have no idea how the doctor knew what he was looking at as he was explaining it to me but there is a lot of stuff inside my body. I mean bones and muscles and tendons and ligaments and cartilage and fluid and organs and veins and blood and cells, etc. I always thought it was one piece of tape-like substance that held my arm to my shoulder. Wow. I was way off. It's complex.

This got me to thinking (imagine the little thinking bubble)...how in the world could all this happen in stages or by chance? It just doesn't add up to me. I mean, if I was somehow evolving and let's say I was just a body (not to mention all the organs that would have needed to evolve perfectly and necessarily for life to function) and was growing an arm but I was missing all the myriad of tendons and cartilage and ligaments and muscles, and veins and arteries, etc. how is that supposed to work? Let's say only a few things grew properly, I would have this floppy appendage growing from my body that was quite useless. How would I eat - you know, get food from anywhere to my mouth? I guess when I reproduced (this isn't so simple either) then the idea must be that the next generation realized that that last part didn't work out so it grew one with a few more tendons or muscles or whatever? Call me naive but it's really confusing to me. It would be a miracle that anything survived on this planet. Ever. How can a whole that is made up of so many millions or billions of parts become a whole if the parts weren't all there in the first place?

Sorry, I am just not smart enough to make the evolutionary leap. Oh yeah, forget about the sports thing - it hurts later in life and girls could really care less. In other words, you're not impressing anyone. Well, it's the truth.